My list of things you should know about me

1.) I've recently decided that all of everybody should see the movie Milk. Absolutely the best movie I have seen in a long while. Everybody, see this movie and see it with everybody that you know. Be moved, take some Kleenex and cry... or sob hysterically as I did... but SEE this movie.

2.) I wear tank tops. I do not wear anything called a wife beater. I don't have a wife, nor would I beat her if I did. And quite honestly I find the term a little offensive...and I don't know why it is "O.k." to call something a "wifebeater." I don't think normal humans would say something like "Gee, those are nice Child Raper pants. Where did you get them?" or "Nice animal torturer hair cut." Anyway, I wear tank tops... please refer to them correctly.




3.) I find muscles that are engaged or lifting a weight super on the sexy. WHOA!!!!!

4.) Unless you have something to show me, do not flex your "bicep" in front of me or I will say "unimpressive" to your face.

5.) If I have said "unimpressive" to you about your flexing, you are forbidden from getting mad... because you brought that on yourself.

Things that I am in love Love LOVE with

1.) The new Kelly Clarkson album, All I Ever Wanted. I downloaded it last night and listened to it at the gym and I'm not gonna lie about it.... she put it down, ya'll. REALLY. Its fantastic. P.S. I'm dedicating a song on the album to myself. The first person to figure out which song I am dedicating to myself gets a prize. You only get one guess... so make sure its a good one.

2.) Shoulders which are puffy and achy from my work out.

3.) Two, count 'em, two bits of lovely to stare at at the gym this morning.

4.) Coffee, I love coffee.

5.) Me!

My list of things that annoy me

1.) People who have started their job, and realized that they can't access the system, nor do they know how to use said system AND THEN call to request training... correction... call and DEMAND training... today. Really? NO. NOT how it works. A failure to plan on your part does NOT constitute an emergency on my part.

2.) Not nearly enough of Dr. Manhattan's behind in the movie Watchmen. I know it was computer generated... but they did nice work.


3.) People who only brew a half pot of coffee. This in itself doesn't really piss me off. But they only use half a package of coffee grounds, which makes sense for the half a pot of coffee. They do this, I assume, because they know they wont drink a full pot and don't want to waste any coffee. The problem lies in the fact that once you open the coffee grounds, the moment they touch oxygen they begin to lose flavor. So, when you open the package and then leave it out all weekend those grounds will taste awful. Sooooo, the coffee grounds will get thrown away and wasted anyway. So, STOP IT. Control your craving at 4:00 p.m. on a Friday afternoon... or brew a full @#%#@^$^ pot.

4.) People who finish the pot of coffee, on a Monday morning... at 9:05 a.m. and don't think to brew another pot. Really? You are either rude or just a complete dumbass!!!!! This is not NOT directed at you Heather. Unless you did it again. Then it is directed at you.

Things that make me happy

1.) Seeing the humiliation of this, again, on American Idol last night. Thank you Porn face girl. I love watching you humiliate yourself on T.V. P.S. Adopting a fake Puerto Rican accent was a great idea and made you look even more on the crazy face.



2.) Friday and Payday

3.) Seeing Watchmen with my older brother tomorrow. Super excited about this. Loved the graphic novel and I'm hoping to love the movie.

My list of things that should be known about me.

1.) When I am done with my work out and I am walking to the locker room through undressing and getting in the shower I listen to Buttons by the Pussy Cat Dolls, featuring Snoop Dog. I listen to it because it makes me feel Uber on the sexy.

2.) I really like my new catch phrase "True beauty comes from within... Its a good thing I'm so damn hot I don't have to worry about true beauty." Shout out to Marc for helping me develop this one.

3.) Generally, although not all the time, I think new born human babies are quite ugly. Every other species on the planet has cute babies... but humans... we drew the short straw on that one.

4.) I get incredibly annoyed at people who "phone it in" at the gym.

5.) I don't hate the LDS church, nor am I anti mormon. I feel as though I out grew the LDS church. Much like a shirt or pair of pants that no longer fit my body, the teachings of the LDS church no longer fit what I know to be true. So, I left it. I don't regret leaving it.

6.) Your opinion of me, weighs less then sunlight.

Things that are fun... or at least fun for me.

1.) Stopping by the bar to visit a friend of mine and getting cat-called while I was there. Incidentally, while at the bar, I was also told that my ass looked like a "piece of jungle gym equipment in those pants". I don't know if I should be horrified or flattered by this comment.



2.) Stopping by the dealership and seeing that, yes, he has in fact, gained all the weight back. It fills me with such vaunted glory.

3.) Buffy Day. Its Buffy Day folks!!!!!



4.) Grande Mochas with non-fat milk and no whip cream. MMMMMM.... Nummy.

My list of things that annoy me.

1.) People, who appear to have no physical disability, who push the handicapped button at a door, to have the door open automatically for them. This just irritates me. I can't say why... it just does. If you are doing this... STOP IT right now.

2.) The hypocrisy displayed by members of the LDS church. I do not mean to be anti-LDS, in fact, I have nothing against the LDS church at all. At its heart, the LDS church (like most every other religion out there), preaches good things. Its hard to fault a church that preaches be nice to people, don't take their stuff or say mean things to or about them. While you are at it, be kind to your self. Try forgiving once in a while. These are all good things. But members of the LDS church (and I am assuming all religions) seem to forget what their religion actually preaches, and seem to act with such glaring hypocrisy to what they believe.

3.) In reference to the above list item: Pride. I'm fairly certain that Jesus and God are rather displeased that their holy buildings are being used for bragging rights.

4.) In reference to item #2: Free agency. Now this is the big one folks, the crux of the LDS religion is founded around the idea of 'Free agency' and yet most LDS church members don't believe in it.

5.) In reference to item #2: Taking the Lords name in vain. This has noting to do with swearing, folks. Talk to any biblical scholar and they will agree with me. It has everything to do with taking any kind of action and claiming to do it in the name of God, when said action is counter to everything God would do or say.