1.) Please put some clothes on and then comb your hair!!!! You are old and gross and nasty. Put your damn clothes on before spending 15 minutes combing your hair.
2.) Please stop wearing that shirt when you work out! You know what would be really pretty, is if you worked out with your shirt off.
3.) You called me and it was a wrong number. Even though we had a pleasant chat, please stop calling me and texting me. I'm serious. Its kind of creeping me out at this point.
4.) Please, please-o-please get bigger.
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