1.) I am tired of lying to myself by telling myself that this will get better. Its been a year, and it feels as though it has gotten progressively worse.
2.) I am tired of pretending, to myself and others, that this is was anything other then a big mistake. I place no blame for my decision on anybody else but me. One of you will read this and feel bad... Please don't. You were trying to help and I appreciate that. The decision was mine, and I take full responsibility for it.
3.) I am tired of trying to convince myself that she actually cares and is trying to make this better for me. She has had opportunities... she hasn't taken them.
4.) I am tired for feeling that, for the past 368 days, I have been completely and totally stalled, with no forward progression. If you wanna know for sure... I actually feel like I've gone backwards.
5.) I am tired of hoping for something that will never come.
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