Thursday, December 31, 2009

My list of my favorite things for today.

1.) Going to lunch with Katie and Michael. We may not be friends in 10 years... but at least we are friends now.

2.) Passing my test that I was really REALLY worried about. Good for me. I was really dreading retaking this test.

3.) Going to dinner tonight at the Melting Pot. Happy New Year to us or me... or him... or the both of us. Who knows?

4.) My dog does NOT have a parasite. Thats the good news. The bad news is that it is all a diet issue now. So, I gots to figure out what he's allergic too and then go from there. I was so sure it was a parasite though. With all the cat shit that dog eats I really am surprised.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

My list good memories from 2009

1.) Dinners with D'Nell. We set a goal to have dinner once a month and by dammit all... be did it. And it was great. And we done spent a lot of money doing it. A lot. We are expensive dates that D'Nell and I. The good thing was, I think we always laughed and we always talked and we always had an open mind... except for the Hoki Gui incident.

2.) The cruise. Oh my God, the cruise.

3.) My love affair with Michael. It could happen... I still have one day left in 2009.

4.) Seeing Wicked in San Francisco. I'll admit... I was hesitant at first... but WHOA... that show was fantastic. Mostly just from the woman who played Ga-Linda... but I liked it.

5.) Reading The Shack. It really was life changing ya'll. I can't explain why... it just really was.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

My list of things I want for Christmas vs. things I don't want for Christmas.

1.)
Yes, I want Andy Roddick (Andy Roddick style, baby) for Christmas. I do NOT want to be reminded that Andy Roddick has a hot wife... Thanks Mike. For that matter, don't remind me that any man I put on the list has a hot wife or girlfriend... unless we are talking about...

2.)
I mean seriously, Victoria. When are we going to be best friends? Yes, I want to be friends with Victoria Beckham for Christmas. I don't want her to bring her kids. But seriously, look at that... she is rockin' the mom outfit. I love her. The only thing I love more then her would be...

3.)

I want to go to San Francisco for Christmas. I can't really think of something I don't want with this... maybe something like I do not want to go to Reno for Christmas.... another thing I do not want for Christmas is ....

4.) Esther to rear her ugly head this season. I've discovered that Esther has really been craving carbs and sweets. Damn you Esther, DAMN you. What I do for Christmas is to see Esther go away, for example




Maybe one day Esther will not be the bane of my existence. Maybe!!!

Friday, December 18, 2009

My list of things I don't like

1.) Friends on facebook suggesting I should become a fan of them or thier site. Really? I already accepted your friendship request.... I don't really have the time nor desire to go beyond that.

2.) Cheesecake squares. If eaten in excessive amounts, these upset ones stomach.

3.) People who see food laying about and assume that they can take some. Thats not yours and you didn't ask. Congrats on being a douche though.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

My list of things you STOP doing

1.) Tattle-telling. Really? REALLY?? You are in your mid-forties and you are going to tattle on me. REALLY? Get a @$#&((%$ life. P.S. If you want to escalate something to my boss... you better make sure you have some ground to stand on.

2.) Inviting me to white elephant parties. I'm sorry people. I don't own garbage. I don't retain things. I put things down and throw things away. Also, invites where I have to go buy a gift, but only spend $10 (sorry Marc-y) just mean I have to go buy some garbage for somebody and then receive some garbage from somebody else. As of this moment, I'm not participating in these types of parties ever again. EVER. I mean it.

3.) Sending mean spirited, antagonistic, or plain ol' rude emails about the food drive "contest". Two things on this really. (OH MY GOD... a list within a list. I think its a first) 1.) Your rude emails do not make me want to donate to our food drive any more. In fact, your rude emails have discouraged me from donating. I donated, 10 pounds of food, to the over all company drive... but I just did not want to participate in the department food drive because of you. Congrats. 2.) This is a @^%$*( FOOD DRIVE. Did you have to make it a competition? Tell me, why did you think that was the best idea? In the (*Y(%*1#@#$^ spirit of the season, or in the spirit of charity and doing good to your fellow man, do you think it might have been better to all work together as a team to meet the goal? Instead of pitting us against each other. Way to ruin it. Congrats.

4.) Bringing/leaving me treats. They are delicious. And yet, I find myself at a time right now were I feel as though I am not doing so well physically. I'm not making the progress that I want. I am a bit depressed about it... and then along comes the cookie. It just makes it harder.

5.) Stop voting for this to win So You Think You Can Dance.



Really America? You had this beautiful dancer that should have won.


Jakob was absolutely beautiful to watch dance. Normally, I'll admit, I watch the women... except when Jakob danced. I couldn't take my eyes away from how beautiful he was. I mean... C'mon. This dance alone. America... you = fail
.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

My list of things that take away peace.

1.) Drama. I try my best to avoid drama. I usually succeed... but when I fail... I fail HARD.

2.) Being late to anything. I just can't handle it. Inner peace is taken away if I think I am going to be late.

3.) The thought of any more testing. I just can't do it. I can't do any more. Its just to damn tedious.

4.) The season finale of Dexter. Damn Ya'll.

Monday, December 14, 2009

My list of people who I never want to hear anything about EVER again.

1.)

Always seemed kind of "douch-ey" to me... and my opinion hasn't changed. Great golfer... but i don't care that you cheated on your wife and I don't understand why America is so interested. Tiger, please exit the building.

2.)

You say stupid things and appear to be quite militant in your stupidity. Rosie, just leave. Don't say goodbye... just get out.

3.)

Enough said. Just make it go away.

4.)


Dear Chesney, You suck and thats sad. Not really. I just hate you and think you have no talent. Leave. LEAVE NOW!!!

5.)

You can't sing. You really can't act... but you know what you can do... GET OUT!
p.s. Yes, I realize the common theme here.

Friday, December 11, 2009

My list of things that are a' bringing me down

1.) Studying for tests. I hate this. And, I have two tests, both for work, that I have to study for. I know I am a bad test taker. For some reason, I always seem to study that which will have one question on the test and completely over look information what will comprise about 90% of the questions on the test. Great. I love failing.

2.) I'm now feeling a terrific amount of pressure to perform. What if I fail or don't live up to expectations. Great! It was easier before when they didn't "know me". Great, I did this to myself. UGGGGG!

3.) Feeling kind of/mostly OVERWHELMED. Its really getting to me. I have not felt this way in a long. I have some rather high stakes things happening for me right now and they all fell out of control. Even my board of "Things I Can Control" feels dominated by things completely and totally out of my control. WHOA!

4.) I fell like my body has gone backwards. I feel like I've lost progress. I feel like most of this is due to the stress I am under.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

My list of wonderful, if not little known, facts about me.

1.) I know how to work an Express sale. I done know this folks and I done be proud of it. For example, last night, I purchased $190.00 worth of Express merchandise for only $90.00. Thats $100.00 worth of free clothes.

2.) I have a small mole on my stomach... right below my belly button. I think the mole is very cute.

3.) I love the smell of books. I like to fan the pages under my nose and take a deep breath.

4.) I spend a lot of my time wondering if I've "missed my chance". What ever that means?

5.) I spend a lot of my time feeling like "something big is coming".

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

My list of things I am enjoying.

1.) This is War by 30 Seconds to Mars. Why have I not heard of this group before? The new album just came out and I am quite enjoying it. Plus... Hello Mr. Lead Singer and Actor Jared Leto

or

How are you today? You may or may not know, Jared, that I recently divorced my ex-wife and I'm heart broken. But, as Mom always says, "The best way to get over somebody is to get under somebody." Would you care to help me out? Please?


2.) 7-11 coffee.



I'm not kidding. I can't get enough of it. And you know what the best thing to do with a monkey on your back is... FEED IT.

3.) Searching for pictures of Jared Leto on Google Images. I'm not going to lie... I'm enjoying looking at him right now. Michael, does he fit my profile of men that are "my type"? Lets just face it... the man can take a pretty picture.

4.) Thinking about the Cha Cha from "So You Think You Can Dance" last night? Now, we all know that I love me some Ryan Dilello... but for reals... If you didn't see this Cha Cha you missed out. This thing was HOT. Whoa... and he danced it so utterly masculine that it made it even hotter. Whoa.

5.) Taking my time this morning. I have to stay at work late tonight, so I've been able to have a slower morning, drink my coffee (feed the monkey) and get the list out on time. Its been a good morning.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

A list of my favorite things

1.) My 7-11 travel/reuseable coffee cup. I've purchased several reusable coffee cups over my years, but my 7-11 one takes the cake. I love it... and it only cost me $1.49.

2.) My video Ipod. Man-o-man that thing comes in handy.

3.) The sweatshirt blanket that I bought for Baxter. I use it myself... actually, we share it. But its warm... I like it... ALOT.

4.) My new facebook friend. I've missed her and was overjoyed to reconnect.

Monday, December 7, 2009

My list of things I need to do today.

1.) Get a divorce

2.) Figure out what is wrong with my dog.

3.) Finish up my Christmas Shopping

4.) Watch BattleStar Galactica

5.) Convince them that they aint seen nothing yet.

Friday, December 4, 2009

My list of things I hate about this season

1.) Tacky-ass Christmas decorations. Mostly those that I see around the office. For example


But some people have real bits of ugly that they choose to display in their home. My question is, on what fruckin' planet is it 'O.k.' to display, and be proud of this garbage? Why is that ok? Seriously, look at the shit you have draped all over your house and tell me, tell me I beg you, that you think its pretty.

2.) The general feeling of mirth and merriment that is in the air. Listen here, I like my piss poor attitude... I quite enjoy it. I don't need you telling me to cheer on up. Oh and by the by, there is a specific reason why I don't like Christmas. If you thought long enough about it, instead of just calling me a scrooge (thinking I give a shit) you might actually ask. And you might actually learn something about me.

3.) Christmas cards. Don't send them... I don't care. And while we are at it, don't send me an "update" on your family. If I cared enough (or at all) I would ask about them. Sending me an unsolicited update on who gives a shit about what your family is doing is just going to make me even more disinterested in them. STOP IT.

4.) White elephant parties. These little gems of horrible seem to dominate this season. Guess what, I don't want your crap. I don't! I'm just going to throw it away. Why don't you do us both a favor and just throw it away yourself? Sidebar: This was not directed you at you, Mike.

5.) Any kind of Christmas activity where I am "strongly encouraged" to participate, but also forced to pay my own way.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

My list of things I love about this season

1.) The Victoria's Secret fashion show.

or



I mean, c'mon. Whats not to love about the fashion show. I wait all year for the fashion show. And, quite obviously, I love me some Marisa Miller. love Love LOVE me some Marisa Miller. Obsolutely stunning... and in the Million Dollar Bra this year... My fashion show evening was complete. F'REALS.

2.) Stephen King books normally come out in the fall.

I think I've made it perfectly clear that I love being wrapped up in a Stephen King book. I love it love Love LOVE it. Mr. King may not be your thing... but he certainly is mine. And, if Im going to wrapped up in a long narrative, I'm happy that its Mr. King who's taking me on that journey. Plus, Mr. King is throwing out the idea that there may be a new book set in Mid-World... this I love.

3.) The flanel sheets, quilts and comforter that I get to put on my bed. Some people like to sleep cold, or warm... I like to sleep with weight on me. Some kind of pressure from the blankets above me.

4.) Having a fire in my fire place. I love this. Bad Air or Burn days be damned. I've got a fire place and I'm going to use it.

5.) My purple christmas tree. I quite enjoy my purple christmas tree. It's lovely.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

My list of things that I want

1.) To not have to study for two tests (count 'em... one... and... two) and write a book report. "Are you back in high school?" you ask. No, chick-a-dees, this is all for work. And I hate it. I'm never good at studying for tests... I seem to always study the wrong stuff. And I really don't want to write a two page book report. That would actually mean reading the book. Yuck!!

2.) To not be getting sick. Throat on fire? Check. Achy body? Check. Sinus pressure? Check? General loopy-ness? Check. Dammit all, I think I'm getting sick.

3.) For Big Jim Rennie to get Big Jim humiliated... and then arrested. He'll probably die of a heart attach though and be spared of the justice he so richly deserves.

4.) To give Heather and Careen a really good reading Thursday. I home item #2 doesn't impact my ability to do that.

5.)
I'm in love with this. I really and truly am.

Monday, November 30, 2009

My list of things I am thankful for

1.) The opportunity to hear my Mom and two sisters sing in the womens choir, We Also Sing. It was an honor and a privilege to listen to and see. I was moved and very proud to hear my family. The concert was absolutely wonderful.


2.) BestBuy. 90% of my Christmas gifts have come from BestBuy. Thank God for you BestBuy. For making my Christmas shopping easier.

3.) Dinners with D'Nell where points of view can be shared and minds opened. I know she'll disagree, but D'Nell is the exception, not the rule.

4.) Stephen King. Man-o-man, Mr. King can spin a fantastic tale and keep me entertained. He can build a story up, and when it all starts to go, he undoes it all with style. I LOVE being wrapped up in a Stephen King book. LOVE it.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

My list of things I am going to enjoy tomorrow.

1.) The appetizers my uncle serves before Thanksgiving. These suckers are delicious... I'm not kidding.

2.) Sleeping in. Really ya'll... I forget how nice it is.

3.) Wrapping in up in my purple afghan (is that what its called, Kim?) and reading my book. Now that the weather has turned a bit cooler... the purple blanket is back... and I love it.

4.) My mom's sweet potato pie. Love Love LOVE my mothers sweet potato pie. Tis yummy ya'll.

5.) Stuffing. I love stuffing.

Monday, November 23, 2009

My list of things that must be said.

1.) Dear teens and pre-teens, if you are shopping at Hot Topic with your mother, and it appears as though you mother's entire outfit came from Hot Topic, you have a problem. This is, in fact, a huge problem and a huge embarrassment for you.

2.) Dear men in the gym locker room, if the need arises for you to remove your pants and underwear, this transaction should take the least amount of time possible. When your gentles are dangling out for the world to see, this is not the time to fix your hair, take off your socks, chat up your work out buddy, put on deodorant, remove your shirt and the list goes on. Take your bottoms off, cover up your business as fast as possible and then move on to those other activities.

3.)Dear Miniusa.com/owner'slounge The "Track your Baby" feature is the bane of my existence and should be turned off. I look at it 100 times a day... and I hate it.

4.) Dear idiot who makes a huge mess while making coffee, I hate you.

5.) Dear America, Taylor Swift is terrible. How is it possible that she keeps winning? And this time you voted for her to win. WTF?

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

My list of things adore

1.) Flo, the lady from the Progressive insurance ads.



I love Flo and I want to be her best friend. I get excited every time I see her on T.V. She makes me giggle... mostly because she gets so excited about stuff. Don't you think she would be fun to hang out with? Well, I do... so suck it.

2.) The sack boy from Little Big Planet.

Are you kidding me? Look how adorable he is. I want one, in real life. Not just on my PS3. Somebody get me a Sackboy.

3.) Coming into work and finding the following taped to my computer.

Ahhhh... my co-workers know me so well. And I love it. Also receiving email cards from my best friends saying things like "Sorry, my self-absorption got in the way of yours." or "I hear what you're saying, I'm just to busy thinking about myself." or gifts that have fun sayings like "It's fun to be thin." all let me know that my co-workers/best friends love me despite my complete and total arrogance, shallowness and narcissistic attitude. And I love myself for all of those things too.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

My list of things I need right now.

1.) Christmas list ideas for those on my "I am shopping for them" list. I try to be a good doobie and not ask what somebody wants, rather I will shop and purchase things that I think the other person would like or that reminded me of the person. Something about that shopping mentality is the true meaning of christmas to me. But, thinking of all of those ideas is damn hard and a pain in my ass.

2.) Michael to dump his other gay friends. All of them... now. Including Heather because lesbians count.

3.) More time to read. Actually, more time to read and stay awake while I do it. I think all of those years reading before I went to bed trained my mind that as soon as I open the book its time to sleep. So, reading = nap time for me now.

4.) A new car loan.

5.) For the dancers to be really good tonight... oh and for Ryan to not have so much clothes on.

Monday, November 16, 2009

My list of things I am coveting... as inspired by D'Nell

1.) The new car I want. It done be sexy as hell ya'll... sexy as hell. And, I want it. I want it now. But do I want the car payment for it. No, I do not. Uggggg.

2.) Any kind of chest that is more defined then mine. For example, this one.



Hell, I just covet the whole damn body. Seriously.

3.) The job that is being held by a certain mother of all darkness. And the thing that kills me is that she doesn't appreciate what she's got. She is wasting it... all of it... and I want to do it much better then her. I'm also fairly certain, that even if Marmee decided to go ruin something some where else... that her position would not be filled. Seeing as how she has ruined that position and made it all but obsolete and not needed in its current department, why would management rehire for it.

4.) Jen and her going on a cruise in a couple weeks. I am really coveting this. I wanna go... on another one... BAD.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

My list of interesting things that happened to me today.

1.) I talked to her. I don't know how I feel about the talk. I don't know what do to about it. I don't know how far to stray from the path that is me.

2.) I decided to take the advice that I used to give people at Mountain America, which was "Be involved and the rest sort it out."

3.) I was strangly invigorated when I decided to get involved.

4.) I don't know why, but I think I disappointed her.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

A list of my favorite things.

1.) The army man at the gym today.


Kiddos, I not normally all up in lust over a man in uniform... but this guy is a crazy ol' hunk of burning something. All jokes about protecting and serving aside... WHOA!!! This man is near perfection... except for one glaring, deal-breaking imperfection. Damn... he was so close. But still... nice to look at.

2.) The Hunky Santa.



Tis the season, chick-a-dees.

3.) The song Bad Romance by Lady Gaga.



I'm loving this. I'm loving this so much I was going to dedicate it to somebody. But now, it is no longer dedicated to you and including this in the list should not be misconstrued as my secret way of dedicating to you. Sorry. In fact, I'm going to dedicate this song to everybody else, but you. Actually, thats weird... so I'm not going to dedicate it anybody... the army man and the hunky santa.


4.) Under the Dome by Stephen King comes out today. One of my most favorite this, arguably my favorite thing, is to be completely wrapped up in a Stephen King novel. I can't wait to dig in to this.

Friday, November 6, 2009

My list of things I am looking forward to doing this weekend

1.) Hanging out with the kids. 'Tis gonna be great, for we might shoot at zombies and then have to answer personal questions about ourselves. Super excited.

2.) Moving back into my basement.

3.) Being a better friend to Jen when she calls by actually answering the phone instead of sleeping.

4.) Finish the book The meaning of Matthew. This book done have my crying every time I open it. I love it, but its hard to read.

5.) Recoup. Thats it, plain and simple... Recoup.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

My list of questions to which I need an answer

1.) Should I go talk to her or should I just let it go? Finding out 'why' wont really change anything... and yet part of me wants to know why.

2.) Why would you feel comfortable wearing that speedo? Yes, you sir, sitting there in your speedo and you 300 lbs of bulk. Really. Really??? No self consciousness at all? None? Really?

3.) I've gone on a week long vacation before and come back to my work outs. Why is my body getting its ass kicked this time around? Really, chick-a-dees, I am stiff and sore and hurting more then I have in a loooooooong time. OUCH!!!!

4.) When will the kids and I (or the three of us... or I guess its the four of us) hang out again?

5.) If he looks so good naked, why wont he send me a picture to prove it? It done be time to put up or shut up!!!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

A list of my favorite cruise memories

1.) Honeymoon cove. Swimming on a private beach with me and only 40 other people was fantastic... and overwhelming. It was at that time that I realized what and adventure I was on. Where else can you take a sail boat across the carribean sea, snorkel and watch sea turtle grace, fish swim and hold a brittle star and a sea urchin and then sit in the water and feel the surf wash over you. It truely was a magical experience.

2.) The butterfly farm. While the rest of Saint Martin sucked, the butterfly farm was super cool. Catching a butterfly and feeding from your finger was incredible.

3.) Sitting out on the suite balcony and watching the sea go by.

4.) The night I had both Lobster and then Prime Rib for dinner. They aint joking around with the food on that ship. Some of the best food I have ever tasted in my life.

5.) The one time that Ester and I got drunk... and boy did we do it up right!!!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

My list of things I learned on my cruise.

1.) Cruising is a lot harder then you would think. Actually, hard isn't the right word. Tiring is the right word. I was TIRED on that cruise. By that last day, whoa... I was exhausted. That cruise rode me hard and done took it all... and then some.

2.) People have no respect for food. I was actually amazed...AMAZED... at the disrespect people had for food. A lot of this comes from how wasteful people were with "free" food. It was shocking.

3.) I wasn't self concious of myself in the "skimpy suit"... but I was self conscious that part of me was hanging out. I actually felt pretty good in "the suit." And hell... if those gross, fat old European men can pull it off... so can Josh.

4.) Finding yourself swimming on a private beach in the Caribbean ocean is an overwhelming experience.

5.) I am proud of how I look... but man-o-man I still have work to do.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

My list of things that are making me blue

1.) The waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting.

2.) Worrying that I'm not good enough.

3.) Worried that I have forgotten something.

4.) I'll miss him over the coming 9 days.

5.) If I go, it wont be the same.

Monday, October 19, 2009

My list of things I like

1.) Adama and Roslin


Lets face it... I love me some Battle Star Galactica. And... one of my favorite things about it is the relationship between Admiral Adama and President Roslin. I like how you know it is there, but the relationship does not take center stage in this show. But every once in a while there are glimpses of how much they love each other. And I love it.

2.) Pretty Woman.



I am not going to lie. I love this show. I think its great... although a bit dated. But I love it and will always watch it if it is on.


3.) My mug full of coffee.

4.) Hearing that Kill Bill volume three is coming. We know how I feel about Uma... and I think I've made it clear via the list that I love Kill Bill 1 & 2 and now that I know volume three is coming out... this is fantastic.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

My list of things that made today great.

1.) Supportive co-workers and friends who know what to say and what to do and when to do it.

2.) The interview is over. I can't tell you how it went, but I can tell you its over. And, I'm relieved.

3.) The hotness that was my outfit today. I love pretty clothes.

4.) The forum went great... and there was no hard core porno shown.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

My list of things that I am worried about.

1.) My interview tomorrow. I'm done thinking about this... but its coming up... and I'm worried.

2.) That I wont enjoy my cruise. From what I've heard, this is not possible... but i'm still worried.

3.) That Famke Janssen will see that I left her off yesterday's list and never talk to me again.



She doesn't talk to me now... but I think she is gorgeous! And I was in love with her long before you all were. I was in love with her from her appearance on Star Trek as Kamala the metamorph.

4.) I'm worried that no matter what decision I make, it will be the wrong one. If a decision needs to be made, I guess.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

My list of women to whom I am attracted:

1.)
Uma will always be at the top of this list. I would invite her to dinner... and I would probably invite her to sit naked.

2.)

Liv would have to be next on this list. There is something about her. I simply think she is stunning.

3.)

Evangeline Lilly... enough said.

4.)


Victoria Beckham. She's more cute then stunning to me... but still HOT.

5.)

Now, this is an interesting one. Because, to me, this is a picture of Buffy... NOT Sarah Michelle Gellar. I was always in love with Buffy, but when I saw Sarah Michelle Gellar in person I was really turned off. But I was always attracted to Buffy.

Friday, October 9, 2009

My list of things I find offensive.

1.)

Seriously... I find these the most offensive. Tacky and Tasteless. If you have one of these throw it out. Seriously, a nice mix of the secular and sacred anybody. Look at the proportions of this... HUGE consumerist image of christmas, next to the little baby small actual spirit/reason for chirstmas. C'mon people. Its not cute, its horrible.

2.)




Leggings.. all of them. I know they aren't in fashion anymore... but some of you haven't figured that out yet. Also, it would seem that some of you didn't figure out that they never should have been "in". If you have some, burn them.

3.)


Enough said. In fact, the less said about this the better.

4.)

The ugliest car on the planet. And I have seen the Honda Element and the Scion. This thing is terrible. Terrible
.

5.)

?????

Thursday, October 8, 2009

My list of things that have become a pain in my ass

1.) Studying for certification. I have to become certified in a program at work. I'll spare you the boring details and just let you know that its a pain in my ass. And I hate it.

2.) Worrying about my cruise. All of a sudden, I am worried about the cruise. Its only 15 days away and I'm getting nervous. What to pack? How to pack? What will we do? How does it all work? As I told my friend Jen last night, I know how to "do" San Francisco. I know what to do, where to go, how to get around... even if I wanna see something new in San Francisco I know how to do it. This cruise a whole bunch of new and I'm nervous about it.

3.) My addiction. I think I have an addiction. I'm not telling you what it is... and I think it is rather benign but I have an addiction and its just starting to wear on me. And its not shopping. Thats is an addiction... but I love it. I love Love LOVE feeding the monkey.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

My list of things to which I am looking forward:

1.) Going to dinner with Jen tonight. We'll talk Anita, Marmee, the stupidness that is Clarissa. We'll talk Halloween and full moon rides. We'll talk and plan and hope and enthuse about how fun it would be to go to Disneyland together and it will be a great time.

2.) Going to dinner with D'Nell. I don't so much know what D'Nell and I will talk about... but I always feel better about myself when the dinner concludes.

3.) Going to drinks with Keri next week. One of the funniest human beings on the planet and I can't wait to go get drinks with her. Its going to be drama ya'll... drama.

4.) Dinner with my folks on Sunday. We'll be celebrating Dan's birthday... two weeks late. Thanks, Sharon.

5.) And most importantly, hanging out with my two best friends and beating the shit out of some zombies this saturday. I honestly can't wait. This will be fun. And it will not include moving a bed or box spring. But it will include food, good friends and some very inappropriate jokes.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

My list of things I am currently enjoying.

1.) Dots candy. But only the reds. If I open a box and three yellows pop out... it is a wasted box. And I hate wasting a good box... of dots.

2.) Making fun of anybody who wears Vibram 5 finger foot gloves. Seriously... Douchers!!!

3.) The fact that it is only 18 days away. 18 kids... only 18.

4.) My two new jackets that I bought. How much do I love buying clothes, times how much I love making the clothes look good, times how much I love spending money equals a happy happy Josh. Man-o-man, I'm going to look sexy on that cruise. You just wait until you see the pictures, Mike, and then we'll see if you still pick Kate over me in the Dating Game.

Monday, October 5, 2009

My list of things I learned this weekend while cleaning out my "stuff" from my parent's house.

1.) I had really shitty taste in music. A lot of garbage country music. Awful. AWFUL I tell you.

2.) I saved a bunch of stuff that is useless... USELESS.

3.) I was really thin in high school... but I'm much cuter now. And I have high school dance pictures to prove it.

4.) I spent a lot of money on books. A LOT. I read them all... but I spent a bunch.

5.) Apparently, I lived by the mantra "One can never have too many Reba McEntire hats." Good god... somebody shoot me.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

My list of things you should not do to me.

1.) Ask me to loan you money... and promise to pay me back. Nope, I done seen that puppet show ya'll... not interested in doing it again. I know you wanna chase your dream and all... but when chasing your dream means you have no job nor income you get to live with that choice. Sorry.

2.) Drink my coffee creamer. Seriously, thats not yours. Put it down.

3.) Tell me I look skinny or thin. I can look fit... or muscular... but not thin. Seriously, stop this. Most people have days where they feel fat... I have days where I feel thin and it SUCKS!!

4.) Turn the fans on. Lady, it is cold out side and it is cold in here and you aren't running that hard and you aren't breaking a sweat so don't turn on the damn fan... especially when it is blowing on me more then it is blowing on you.

5.) Come to my class late. You will be told to go back to your clinic and reschedule. Those that don't have the courtesy to come on time should not waste mine.

Monday, September 28, 2009

My list of things I wanna do today.

1.) Read/continue reading The Meaning of Matthew by Judy Shepard. If you've not read this, or if you've not heard Judy speak, do your self and your soul a favor and do it...NOW. Never will you meet a woman who has every right to be angry, but turn that into a passion to make the world a better place. Read the book... go to her speaking events... you will be better for it.



2.) Bad things with him. When he walked in, the air went out. ... I don't know who he is, but I know before the night is through, I wanna do real bad things with [him].

3.)Finish up my week and a half long project. Its been long and awful and it will be over tonight...fingers crossed.

4.) Watch Dexter... again. I'll not lie. I was really disappointed in season 3... but season 4 started last night and I was chilled like I was during the first season. Uggg... last nights episode kept me awake last night.

5.) Have it be 26 days from today.

Friday, September 25, 2009

My list of things I like to do

1.) Shun people. Once shunned, I have every right to ignore them. Where as, before, I just ignored them because I'm generally a straigh up A-hole... once shunned, I am within my rights. Thank you, shunning, THANK YOU!!

2.) Walk on the municipal pier in San Francisco. If you haven't done it, do it. A majestic view of the city is provided.

3.) Go to Market Street for dinner. Which I am doing to night. Yummmmm.

4.) See the mummy dance. Oh my dear mummy... Dance for me Dammit.

5.) Watch Glee. I didn't comment on this weeks episode, but it was fantastic. LOVED IT.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

My list of things I enjoyed today

1.) Sushi dinner with my dad.

2.) Spending the day with Kate.

3.) Feeling like a valued employee

4.) Trash talking everybody to tried to kick the goal... whether they made it or not.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

My list of simple requests

1.) Guy at the gym... wear underwear. I'm not gonna judge if you wanna spend some time checking out the ladies who are working out. I, myself, have been known to check out the guys who are working out. But, please make the choice to wear some kind of underwear... a brief, boxer... a boxer brief even. Underwear keeps everything all nice and snug in one place and goes a LONG way to hiding that reaction you are having to checking out the ladies. So... long story short... go get yourself some Hanes.

2.) Step instructor... lay off the heavy weights. I'm not kidding. If you ask that I pick up the heavy weights one more time, I will hit you with them. I'm not kidding... I'll hit ya.

3.) Express... stop sending me emails. Especially emails that say something to the effect of 'Spend $50.00 to reach the next gift level." I view this as a challenge... like you are daring me to spend that much. And we all know how much I feed the monkey... the monkey starts a'screamin' for food and I just gotta. I can't help myself.

4.) Prospective new boss... hire me right now. This is just an open request to anybody who would be interested in hiring me... and paying me lots of money.

5.) Facebook farmers... stop sending me things. I have no more room. I'm done full up on trees and sheep and pigs and horses and ducks and artichokes. I can't handle any more on my farm... until I can get a bigger farm... but I don't know how to do that... so I'm stuck with the small farm. Oh, and stop asking me to send you things when you've sent me something. In that case its not a gift anymore... its a trade...and I don't believe in trades.

Monday, September 21, 2009

My list of things I just don't wanna do.

1.) Ever see Snooty and the Beast again. I took the sibs to see this mess at Desert Star Playhouse. First, what an incredibly mormon thing for me to do. Second, it just sucked. Plain old sucked. And it seemed to me that the players knew it sucked. They just appeared kind of bored and embarrassed the whole time. Plus it was just a confusing mess. Start to finish. A director and some kind of logical plot could have helped. Oh, and up to date jokes would have been nice.

2.) Update my resume. This is a terrible process and I hate it.

3.) Work. I am having the hardest time getting the motivation to work... on ANYTHING. Even getting this list ready was hard.

4.) Worry about the status of my application anymore. I forget what a miserable process job hunting/applying actually is. I don't like it and I just want it to be over. I try not to dwell on it... but its a pain in the ass sometimes.

5.) Any more laundry. Seriously chick-a-dees. Yesterday was laundry day and you wouldn't think I would have that much... but you would be wrong. All day long with the laundry. But it was all day long with my two... correction three favorite things. Sam and Dean Winchester and Lee Adama. Yumm.

Friday, September 18, 2009

My list of things I am looking forward to enjoying this weekend.

1.) The Utah State Fair. I love the fair.... Love it. But, I haven't gone yet. Normally, I go all the damn time... but not this year for some odd reason. Nothing makes me feel better then looking around at your typical fair-goer and knowing how much better I am then them. I can't wait for this boost of self esteem.

2.) Eating Fair Food. Do it... I dare you. Throw caution to the wind and eat that deep fried something. They aren't sure its food... they aren't sure how it got into the boiling fat... but damn it all.... they are going to serve it up and you are going to eat it.

3.) Going to Desert Star with my sibs. I just hope the show is funny. If not... then this will be suckage.

4.) Not having a cardio class tonight. Seriously, four in one week. WTF was I thinking. It gonna kill me.

5.) Sleeping in tomorrow.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

My list of choices

1.) Butterfly farm and shopping OR leisurely day at the beach. Tough decision as both kind of sound fun.

2.) Tell her OR not tell her. An ethical dilemma if I have ever faced one. I've been honest up until now. Does it appear that I am not being honest if I don't tell her the update.

3.) Go to step class OR go home. I don't know why I am torturing myself with four cardio classes a week. UGGGG... it done be hard. And step is the worst.

4.) Develop my training lesson plan OR study up for my certification. I don't really wanna do either. The third option is surf the web.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

My list of things that I am tired of

1.) The way my knee feels right now after I whapped it on a weight plate at the gym this morning. It done hurts, bad, chick-a-dees. BAD... and I have step class tonight. We are going to see how this goes.



2.) Having a computer that just randomly decides to work at glacial speed. Its like my computer just decides that its had enough "processing" and now it just wants to take it easy. Uggggg... chick-a-dees... UGGGGGG!

3.) The Rollercoaster that is my life lately. I feel like my life is this:


a completely knotted mess and who really knows what way is up. I try, except for one dark moment in my past, to run from all drama. I abhor it... but right now... I kinda feel smack in the middle of it. I don't like it so much.

4.) Waiting for my cruise. Waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting... there is a certain amount of boredom that is built into waiting... waiting... waiting.

5.) Anything and EVERYTHING Taylor Swift. This girl needs to SIT down and shut her off key mouth.

Monday, September 14, 2009

My of things I don't understand.

1.) Why - o - why don't the radio stations play Single Ladies by Beyonce any more. I can't explain why, but this song ALWAYS makes me happy. Do the dance, Marc... Do it.



2.) Why - o - why did they wait until the third week of school to begin construction on Foothill Blvd? They had all summer... and yet they start now.

3.) Why - o - why do people create drama for themselves? I know, I know, sometimes its necessary... but I live in a state that abhors drama... and when there is drama i have a mini come apart.

4.) Why - o - why don't people see the world the way I do? T'would be sooooo much easier and drama free... plus everybody would think that I am HOT.

Friday, September 11, 2009

My list of things I want to say to her.

1.) I'm sad too, because if I leave it wont be the same.

2.) Who knows what the future holds... and this may turn out to be nothing.

3.) If it turns out to be something, please be happy for me.

4.) You are important to me and so is our relationship. If I leave, I'll maintain it, if you will.

5.) I love you.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

My list of things that I have discovered.

1.) Being in an almost constant state of hating your job for the past two years really begins to wear on a girl. I'm not kidding you, chick-a-dees... I am in a funk and it aint going no where.

2.) Glee is probably the funniest show I have seen in a long time. Seriously, kiddos, are you watching this? I just happened to discover it last night when I was to lazy to change the channel after my favorite dance show and I discovered Glee. Oh my shit... I thought this was a riot. Completely hi-larious and slightly inappropriate. Loves it! Start watching it... NOW!

3.) My Zumba teacher is sexy. Long legs, a full range of motion in those hips and core strength that doesn't quit... she done be SEXY ya'll. WHOA!!!

4.) Step Class is hard. Seriously... HARD. You would think, if you were just watching a step class, that it doesn't look so hard. You would be wrong. Its HARD!!!!

5.) I really don't like being tired all the time. Damn cardio.
--

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

My list of things I am dreading right now

1.) My cardio class tonight. The one yesterday kicked my ass... the one tonight probably wont be much better.

2.) Setting up for my training tomorrow which will take approximately 2 hours. Yuck... and even yuckier.

3.) Sitting at work tonight until 5. I'll probably leave early. Nobody will notice... and it will make me feel better.

4.) Waiting for SYTYCD to start. I really enjoyed this show and I'm excited for it to start up again... I just dont want to wait for it. Hopefully, there will be another two or three good bodies to look at.

5.) Waiting 45 more days until October 24th.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

My list of things that are great

1.) Finally being able to watch the first episode of season four of Supernatural. This was fantastic as I have been missing the Winchesters. Plus, angels and deamons... this season is gonna be super cool... I can feel it.

2.) Not having any ice cream at the ice cream party. I done be proud of myself ya'll.

3.) Going home now. I sorry for the lateness of the list ya'll.

4.) My Kenneth Cole hat. Its super on the sexy.... SUPER on the SEXY!!!

Monday, August 31, 2009

My list of GREAT things.

1.) The two beautiful and HOT jackets I purchased this weekend. They are glorious!
2.) Spending Saturday with my sibs. They are actually pretty fun to hang out with... Raging Waters and The Pie for dinner mixed in with my sibs... who could ask for anything else.
3.) My Friday night out with my wife, beard or hag. She'll answer to any of those terms of endearment... or you can just call her Katie... or Cats. Anywho, Dinner, which turned into drinks at my favorite martini bar, which then turned into slutty dancing at Club Jam... all in all a GREAT night.

4.) Going to by coffee and hearing "Don't leave me this way" by Thelma Houston over the loud speakers. I had to pretend to shop around Whole Foods for food... while really I was just jamming out to the music... and maybe dancing in the aisles.

5.) A semi-nude scene on BSG with my favorite Jamie Bamber. I probably watched the scene 5 time. It was fantastic.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

My list of things I don't understand.

1.) Taylor Swift, and the fascination with her. Near as I can tell, she mumbles, in a very monotone voice, through every song she sings... correction speaks her way through. Seriously, people, can you hear her? She is not good... more specifically she is terrible.




2.) People who hang, or display, religious pictures or items at work. Remember, this girl is all about religious freedoms and all... but keep it at home. The office is not the place to display a picture of Jesus or have your holy religious books setting out.

3.) People who don't like the banana Runts. I love these and I always save them and eat them last.




4.) Why they can't release season four of Supernatural today. Seriously, I can't wait another week to find out whats up with Sam and Dean.


5.) Why does he choose to bathe in his cologne, instead of just spraying a few puffs on himself. Seriously dude... its overpowering.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

My list of monkeys that I have to feed

1.) Shopping for underwear. For example, see the sample below. Mr. Andrew Christian, you cannot send me a picture of this underwear and expect me not to buy it.




2.) Shopping for clothes. I went for so long only getting new clothes once a year (for chirstmas. Thank you, Sharon.) And, I always promised myself that when I got a job that paid well, I would update my wardrobe more often. But now, I can't stop, because I love Love LOVE new clothes and I love Love LOVE buying them.

3.) Coffee. What can I say? I love it.

4.) Working out. I love looking good... mostly because I love looking good in things like the underwear pictured above.

5.) Myself. Lets just face it, I am addicted to myself. And why... well because I love me!!!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Today my mood is defeated.

Monday, August 24, 2009

My list of mottos.

1.) I can only change me.

2.) Today brings me one day closer.

3.) What can I control? What can I influence? What can I leave behind?

4.) Its fun to be thin.

5.) Nobody trusts a moron.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

My list of things that made today great!

1.) My second full day spent with one of my best friends, Jen. Talking about The Sims, Books, Movies and clarissa... for just a second part of me believed it was like old times again. I miss working with you, Jen... I really do. I didn't say it then, but when I told you the conference was making me sad, I was sad because of how much I miss working with you. I think the mixing of my bubbles proves at least one thing... you are in my heart... and my life is better for it.