#8 Brian

I've known Brian for 15 years. Brian and I met on America Online (Remember those days?) when we were both very young. I have stayed in contact with Brian for 15 years and he has been there for most of my roller coaster and I have been there for his. We decided that we needed to finally meet. And what better place to meet someone than in Disneyland.

Lets be honest. I was going to Disneyland. Its been 5 years since I was there and I just wanted to go. I invited Brian to meet me there.

I had a great time. Brian is interesting, funny and pretty attractive. It wasn't weird. It was just like two old friends meeting and hanging out. There was no agenda and there was no expectation for anything.  I had to mentally prepare myself for this trip because I really didn't want to go out there and have some expectation  of some fantastically romantic time. The reality is, Brian lives in Burbank and I live in Salt Lake City. I really do not want to attempt anything long distance. AT ALL. Third time is not the charm on that.  I was very nervous going out there to see Brian. I didn't want anything to progress to the point of a long distance relationship. I didn't want to have a fantastically wonderful time, fall madly in love and then come back to be rejected with in a week. So, I prepared myself to just be friends with him.

I think I prepared myself a little to well. Brian wanted the trip to be romantic and wonderful. He tried really hard to make it such. Unfortunately, the little voice in my head prevented me from getting to the same level Brian did.  We had a great time. It was like a four day long date and one of the best dates I've been on in a while, but emotionally, I just didn't feel it.

It was probably Ok that I didn't feel it because I could have been really pissed off by a couple things. Number 1.) Brian runs his own business and he is pretty successful at it. This leads to Brian having to work, ALOT. In fact, the day I got out there, Brian picked me up from the airport and took me to Disneyland, dropped me off and then went to work. I spent my first day in Disneyland by myself. This isn't so bad as I am fairly good at vacationing by myself. I am also fairly good at getting drunk by myself. And let me tell you this, Chick-a-Dess, being drunk in Disneyland is an item that is no longer on my bucket list. After Brian got to the hotel Wednesday night, around 1 AM, he really didn't stop working. He took sales calls the whole time I was there. I heard a lot of "Let me just take this call. It will only be 5 minutes." More like 20. I eventually got to the point where I just walked off and told him I would be back. I could have been pissed off that I was sitting around waiting for him to take calls. I wasn't.

Number 2.) Brian goes to Disneyland a lot. Probably once or twice a week. He has ridden everything ALOT. Therefore, he wasn't to keen on riding stuff. I heard "Thats to jerky." or "That one is to fast." or "Lets just find one where we can sit." the whole trip. I hadn't been to Disneyland in five years, so jerky or not, I want my fat ass on those rides. So, I ended up riding most things by myself. In fact, during the four days I was there, Brian and I only rode four rides together. FOUR. 1.) Soarin' over california. 2.) That Toy Story thing in DCA 3.) Story book land. 4.) The little Mermaid.  Good thing I'm ok to vacation by myself and have no shame saying "Yes, Im a single rider."

All in all, it was a great trip. I had a fantastic time. I just wish I could feel the same way about Brian as he does for me.

# 7 Ken

Ken was balding, boring and uninteresting.

Ken probably had interesting things to say, but the weird thinning hair and the oddly hairy neck just kind of turned me off.

My sister, Robyn, and I like to quote lines from some of our favorite TV shows. One of our favorites involves a man who is on a date with a woman who has an unusually large head. The man cannot get over the size of this woman's head.  He is on the date mentally telling himself attractive features she has. His internal dialouge goes something like this.

"Nice smile. Pretty eyes. Looks good in the dress. BIG HEAD BIG HEAD BIG HEAD."

I think this is what I was like on my date with #7.

"Interesting. He works in IT. Cool. He likes video games. Neat, he... WEIRD BALD HAIR PATTERN."

It just didn't work out OK.

Im sure he was nice, but not for me.

#6 JD

JD was interesting. I think he was interesting, mostly, because he was a compulsive liar. JD, you are from a small town in central Utah. Its just not possible you had that much sex in high school. More on this later.

JD was actually a pretty attractive fellow. Tall. Nice build. Great smile. We had been chatting via text for a couple weeks and decided to go to a local gastro-pub for a beer and a hamburger. JD started of well by being punctual. That was a good thing. JD was interesting to talk to, shared interesting stories about his life and seemed interested in mine.

Then the lies started. I guess I shouldn't accuse him of lying, but these yarns he was a-spinning did seem quite a bit fanciful. I don't believe there is a super hot guy in the office, that is married with two kids, whom hits on every girl in the office and then comes to your place on the weekend so you two can work one out. I don't beleive this same individual goes to gay bars every Friday and Saturday night and dances in only his garments. I do not believe this same individual is really well endowed. I don't believe any of this because I do not believe this man is real.

I do not believe that your younger brother caught you having sexual relations with the straight star high school quarter back and a vaccuum cleaner and I do not believe that your younger brother blackmailed you with such information for 2,3,5 years. Yes, chick-a-dees, the story of how long he was black mailed changed.

I do not believe you had sex with the several members of the straight high school swimming/diving team (all at different times) in the corn fields.

I do not believe you found out you were allergic to corn by having sex with the straight high school gym coach in your parents barn.

These are just some of the wild tales told by JD.  It seemed as though JD had read some porn mag stories before he came on the date. I was not impressed.

There was also a tale involving a goat.  I'll spare you.